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There Are Gifts At Every Turn


Resilient people have a habit of finding the gifts at every turn in their lives. Whether the event they experience is positive or negative, they can find a gift in there somewhere. It’s a practice that helps them grow stronger and able to more easily bounce back from low points in their lives.

The other day I was talking to a friend on the phone about the roller coaster of her life in the past several months. To top off an incredible string of really difficult situations – including the death of her mother – she found out she was being audited by the IRS.

Finally, I gently asked, “Mary, do you think you’ll be able to find any gifts in this?”

I almost expected her to sigh and ask how I could possibly think there were gifts anywhere to be found. I mean, how could an IRS audit be a gift?

Mary did sigh. But instead of being frustrated at the idea of gifts, she said, “I’ve already found one. I’ve learned that I need help. I can’t do everything myself like I’ve always thought. I need a CPA and I need someone to help me organize. Even though this is really hard, the gift is in deciding to let go and ask for help.”

Because she was open to seeing the gift in her situation, Mary will not only survive her run of bad luck, but also come out stronger and more resilient.

What about you? What gifts are you finding in your life?



  1. HeyAnnis says:

    So true, Bobbi. For years, in tough situations, I've said to myself and others, "Look for the gift." There always is a gift, though sometimes we don't see it until the ordeal is over and circumstances change. When we recognize the gift, it changes our persepctive on the problem. Cheers, Annis

  2. Bobbi Emel says:

    Thanks for sharing this, Annis. You are so right about the importance of changing perspectives. It's a gift of the gift, isn't it? Bobbi

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Bobbi Emel is a therapist who helps people in Los Altos, Palo Alto, Mountain View and the greater Bay Area manage their stress and develop their strengths.
She is effective in helping people dealing with anxiety, worry and grief; and also those who want to improve their effectiveness and performance.