Pacing yourself through suffering: 5 questions to ask when you’re ready to give up

I was struggling.Biking uphill

My breath was coming in gasps and I fought to keep my bike upright.

I was working my way up a long, steep hill. My friend, Keila, rode to my left, listening to my panting.

She was not breathing heavily as she maintained a slow, steady pace.

We had ridden this hill before. It was three miles with an average grade of 6% – challenging, but in recent tries I had been successful making it to the top without stopping.

My heart thumped hard and fast. My mind screeched at me to stop.

I stubbornly kept on, feeling more and more irritation with myself that the hill was this hard for me.

I uttered an expletive that I won’t print here but sounds suspiciously like “Smucker.”

After 37 mostly horrible minutes, we reached the top.

I dismounted and stood over my bike, my elbows on the handlebars, head down, trying to get my breath back.

When my wheezing subsided a bit, I straightened up and looked over at Keila. She was also standing over her bike, but she had her phone out and was texting someone.

No sign of struggle there.

I shook my head and rasped, “I don’t know why that was so hard this time.”

Keila looked at me and said in a soft voice,

It’s because when you start to suffer, you speed up. And then you get mad.


Continue Reading

6 ideas to help you bounce out of depression

Note: This is a guest post by blogger and author David Ramos.   The phone rang. I lifted my head up off the tear-soaked pillow and searched for the phone under a mess of tissues and blankets. Hello, I said, doing my best to sound as if I hadn’t just finished crying. Hey man, how [...]

Continue Reading

Knowing this one thing about yourself can change your life

Wouldn’t it be great if there was an easy fix for problems? Some little thing you could do that would help you bounce back in a big way from a rough patch in your life? Occasionally, there is. Here are a couple stories from my private practice (names and identifying details have been changed) of people [...]

Continue Reading

15 easy tips to bounce back from everyday frustrations

Your gossipy co-worker cornering you in the break room. Finding yourself in an unexpected traffic jam on the only day you have a meeting first thing in the morning. Getting another notice of your unpaid telephone bill even though you paid it two weeks ago. Being placed on hold again by the customer service department of [...]

Continue Reading

Need more self-esteem? 5 reasons why you really don’t.

“If I only had more self-esteem, I would be completely happy,” my young client declared as we discussed her goals for therapy. Internally, I heaved a big sigh. “Okay,” I responded, “Let’s explore self-esteem . . .” What happened to self-esteem’s cred? Remember when parents and teachers were encouraged to make sure children developed healthy [...]

Continue Reading

How to be strong: Grow down

I’ve been thinking about this idea for several months. Usually, posts near the end of the year have to do with reflecting back upon the year that was or talk about planning for how the upcoming year will be bold, wonderful, and groundbreaking for you. I hope your year is bold, wonderful, and groundbreaking for [...]

Continue Reading

7 ways to have more gratitude (and 3 times not to be grateful)

As I write this, we are fast approaching the Thanksgiving holiday here in the States. The season has me thinking about giving thanks and being grateful. It’s pretty well established that gratitude is good for you. Leading gratitude researcher Robert Emmons has found that gratitude leads to stronger immune systems, lower blood pressure, more feelings [...]

Continue Reading

How to bounce back even when you’re exhausted

“I made a mistake and I’ve been awake the last two nights worrying about it.” My friend, Valerie, said this the other night as we talked with a woman we consult with, Mary. Valerie made the mistake on an assignment for Mary. “Oh, Valerie! I’m sorry you were so worried about it,” Mary responded, concerned. [...]

Continue Reading

Powered by WordPress. Designed by Woo Themes