With everything changing so fast right now, I thought this might be a good time to bring back this post from the archives. It’s full of ways to bounce back from everything from feeling isolated to being bored to managing the varied emotions that come with our experience with Covid-19.
Our greatest glory is not in never falling, but in rising every time we fall. ~ Confucius
By now, you know how life works.
We stand up and we fall down again, just like a toddler learning how to walk.
There are many ways to pick yourself back up and I’m presenting you with 55 of them to get you started.
Use one or two that you like the most or mix and match to your heart’s content.
Text in this color means that it is linked to a helpful article on that topic so make sure to check it out.
Okay, go get your bounce on!
1. Accept the reality of your situation. Face the facts – it’s happening.
2. Realize that change is always going to be in your life. Expect it.
“I always thought things would calm down and get easier. I’m beginning to think that’s not going to happen.” Phoebe Howard, age 99.
4. Be nice to yourself. Treat yourself as you would your best friend.
5. Remember that everyone has flaws. Everyone. You’re a part of the human race so you’re bound to make mistakes.
6. Practice mindfulness by noticing your thoughts and feelings, but have no judgment about them.
7. Resistance is like a Chinese Finger Puzzle. The more you struggle, the tighter you’re held in the puzzle.
8. Be flexible and open in your way of thinking. It will allow you to problem-solve more effectively and accept your reality more easily.
9. Have a tribe. Social support is absolutely essential in bouncing back in life.
10. Talk about your difficulties with trusted friends and family members. You don’t have to tough it out. Talk it out instead.
11. Let go of judging your thoughts and feelings. Just notice them. Read Taming Your Gremlin.
12. See if there is a gift hidden within your troubles. The sand that irritates the oyster eventually becomes a pearl.
13. Develop post-traumatic growth. The basics are being optimistic and framing your struggles as meaningful (finding the gifts and opportunities in them.)
14. Look at problems from different angles.
15. Remember that you’ve made it through tough times before. And you’re still here to talk about it.
16. Instead of wasting energy resisting what’s happening in your life, accept what is and use that energy to enjoy the good things in your world.
17. Think about kaleidoscopes. The pattern is beautiful, but when it gets shaken up, a wonderful new pattern can emerge.
18. Take a break.
19. Find something that makes you laugh really hard.
20. Have a mentor. Find someone you trust and admire and use them as your go-to person for advice, support, and guidance.
21. Remember that your thoughts aren’t always true.
22. Remember that it’s okay to have fun, smile, and laugh sometimes even when you are in the worst of situations.
23. Just because you struggle with something doesn’t mean you’re not resilient. It means you’re human.
24. Everyone makes mistakes. Everyone.
25. Sometimes things really do suck. No one said you have to like the difficulty in front of you.
26. Look up. Get out of your head and actually look up from time to time. What do you see that you didn’t notice before?
29. Practice acts of kindness.
30. Once a week, write down what you’re grateful for.
31. Take action to solve the problem rather than just ruminating about it.
32. Stop ruminating.
33. Savor the good stuff. The next time you see a beautiful sunset, stop and really see it.
34. Don’t resist.
35. Drop your struggle against change. We want to feel like we’re flexible and open and yet, when change arrives, we resist it as though it were the devil.
36. Do what is in front of you.
37. Embrace your shadow. We all have a dark side – don’t run from yours.
38. Remember that falling apart means you can put yourself back together any way you’d like.
39. Express yourself. Don’t try to stuff your negative thoughts.
40. Focus on the positive rather than predict the negative.
42. Distract yourself from your troubles for awhile. Healthy stuff only!
44. Remember that this is how it feels today. It won’t be like this all the time.
45. Get over fear of failure. Learning from failure is one of the best ways to bounce back when we don’t quite meet our own expectations.
46. Remember that Suffering = Pain x Resistance.
47. Adopt a growth mindset rather than a fixed mindset. See failures as opportunities to learn rather than unmanageable setbacks.
48. Believe that life is meaningful. “Those who have a ‘why’ to live for can bear with almost any ‘how.’” Frederich Nietzsche.
49. Don’t take things personally. That’s what pessimists do. You’re trying to be an optimist, remember?
50. Increase your creativity to be able to improvise solutions better. Read A Whack on the Side of the Head.
51. Be willing to grow.
52. Let it go.
53. Stay away from shame. Watch Dr. Brene Brown’s Tedx talk.
54. Change what you can, accept what you can’t.
55. Breathe.
Which of these works best for you? Or do you have other ideas that I may have missed?
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Daena Smoller says
Loved them all; thank-you!
Bobbi says
You’re very welcome, Daena! Good to hear from you!
Barbara Addison says
This was splendid. Doing some memoir work and blaming, criticising self – you could have done that (at 8 years when a carer!). The tips led me to Care giver-Child role reversal and narcissistic abuse etc. I am now encouraged to look at The Critic and write things down as stories. Find a mentor though …… um.
Bobbi says
Hi Barbara,
Glad this was helpful for you. Seems like it’s given you a lot of things to think about.
TONY M ROSSODIVITA says
Be gentle with yourself when you most need it.
Sometimes you cant tell when that is, because you are so caught up in your anxiety. Take that as the signal for self-gentleness.
TONY M ROSSODIVITA says
Be gentle with yourself. Sometimes you will get all caught up in your feelings and emotions. Try to express them and realize those are then the signals for self-gentleness.
Bobbi says
Great advice, Tony, thanks!
Su says
Thank you , a useful and thorough list for these challenging times. i shall share with some friends
Bobbi says
Thanks, Su, I’m glad you’ll be sharing it with friends!